The last few weeks have been difficult. The stress from work, combined with health issues loved ones are facing, have pushed me over the edge.
Last week I bought a pack of cigarettes. My first since 1989. I was climbing walls, and caved to the crave. Since quitting, I've missed cigarettes non-stop. I lit that first smoke last week and it was heaven - there's not a drug in that world that could have equalled that. Since then I've smoked 3 or 4 a day, and loved every single puff of every one. My hands have been shaking lately, but after a cigarette I'm steady as a rock. I hope this doesn't become a habit, but I sure love it right now.